[R.A.E.F]

Sometimes in life, things will happen in life that will threaten to throw you off the course.

And sometimes, the fear that follows is disabling. A fear so strong it messes up your sense and brings out your worst fears, so clear that you place belief in that which is neither proven nor real.

You begin to believe in the worst and dwell in the immense pit of negativity that baptizes you over and over again in an almost drowning state. You flail and then go under so many times you lose count of just how much oxygen you’re managing to inhale.

Life gets dark and lonely. You get weird. The burden that you carry that oozes out this immense fear blinds you everything else. You shield your heart because you can’t stand to accept the pain that is coming. The pain that is going to be inflicted. The pain you will inflict. You fall prey to the [truth] that you are alone and worthless and you will take this hidden fear to your grave.

You become oblivious to the fact that this fear piles up interest as time goes on. So it gets heavier. Your knees begin to buckle. You begin to feel the back ache. You’re burning a lot of energy just trying to keep carrying it. It becomes more painful and harder as time goes on. You find yourself always holding back because of the fear of letting go. You become so used to the fear that for a moment, you begin to believe the fear to be more family than family.

The fear becomes familiar.

This fear can kill.

If [Unforgiveness] corrupts the soul, [Fear] strangles your heart and your voice.

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There comes a time in life where it is okay to admit you’re not okay.

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Everything gets better after that.