That which is unexpected / Truth cycle

The week started great.

Better than expected actually. Work progressed much better as things were being done well before deadlines and all those extra stuff.

Then came the first missed call.

And the obvious expected callback which resulted in listening to the robot tell me to leave a message and try again at a different time. A voicemail, I believe was the idea.

Then came the second missed call.

And this time, it came with a voicemail.

I perform the much needed callback almost instantly.

She answers.

And then the conversation occurs. 10 minutes later, I’m back at my desk, clutching the edges of my table, wondering exactly how this managed to happen. I tell myself to calm down. I can feel my heart beat steady. Slow. Heavily.

Mental faculty goes quiet. It can’t articulate properly anymore. Questions get dropped into the silent space, but the neurones avoid the virus. My mouth goes numb, my eyes get sharper. I remain in full alert. My face falls back into default. A fake smile creeps on my lips and I let it stay.

“I will ride the wave till the end.”

I hear the words echo in my skull, reverbrating in the ’empty’ shell.

“…till the end.”

—————————————–

Officially, I get an oral thumbs.

Unofficially, I get a written mark down.

Which is the truth? which is the lie?

I question the dissent. I question the difference.

I find confusion at the crossroad.

I see dilemma in the options.

Do I trust one? Do I trust the other?

Which is the issue?

What is the solution?

Mental strength burdened by the responsibility.

Apathy clears the nonsense.

Apathy creates a new plan.

“Say BS to that which is BS,

Close your heart to those who have wronged you.

Let them know they’ve lost you.

Let them know they’ve hurt you.

Let them know you don’t actually care anymore.”

Heart listens with an open ear.

Gladdened by that which might be right.

Till mind empties the room.

The silence presents a solace.

But then the cycle begins again.

Which is the truth? which is the lie?

I question the dissent. I question the difference.

I find confusion at the crossroad.

I see dilemma in the options.

Do I trust one? Do I trust the other?

Which is the issue?

What is the solution?

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